Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I can read

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

Why do women like black men?

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

Imagine we could fly into space and take a selfie of our galaxy. This spacecraft made the most detailed map of the Milky Way ever - BBC Sky at Night Magazine

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I don’t cotton to rapists

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

What can anal toys bring to straight men?

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

Is the Las Vegas Grand Prix considered one of the "premier events on the Formula 1 calendar?"

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

Planet Nine? Not quite, but some astronomers think they've spotted a new dwarf planet - NBC News

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

Nelly Korda makes seven birdies, storms up the leaderboard in Round 2 of U.S. Women's Open - NBC Sports

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

Samsung teases Galaxy Z Fold 7 with an absolutely bizarre ‘Ultra experience’ [Video] - 9to5Google

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I can count

CNN interrupted for devastating Elon Musk news amid Donald Trump showdown - Irish Star

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I see through liars

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

Part toy, part fashion, the arrival of the viral Labubu was a long time in the making - AP News

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I have complete contempt for fakery

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

Why are people so rude to debt collector’s? I am one and I am so tired of being mistreated. We are under paid and then have to deal with the most ungrateful, and disrespectful people. We aren’t customer service. Don’t get mad at us because YOU owe.

I have a reading level above third grade

I know who the president of Turkey really is

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

Zika Virus Is Back After 6 Years in One of the Most Popular U.S. Tourist Destinations - AOL.com

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I understand how hurricane paths work

Europe cuts interest rates as Trump's tariffs loom - BBC

I don’t buy bullshit

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

What questions will be asked by the executive director of JP Morgan for 6 years of experience in Java? The technical rounds are already cleared.

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I actually pay taxes

Omada Health Shares Soar After IPO as GLP-1 Drugs Fuel Interest - WSJ

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability